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Sugar daddy wants money back and makes threats — what should I do?

Personal Finance & Money Asked on December 27, 2020

This sugar daddy has been texting me and telling me to be his baby. Jokingly, I told him yes and he sent me a lot of money. Now, he wants it back. I tried sending it back in multiple ways but it won’t let me because I am under 18. He has threatened me with the FBI saying he has my address and that I am being tracked. I don’t know what to do at this point.

2 Answers

You are being scammed.

A sugar daddy who doesn't know you in person is almost always a scam.

A common type of scam is where someone sends you money and then asks you to send some of it to someone else. Having done this you would find the money you were sent was fraudulent or reversed, leaving you out of pocket for whatever you sent. You can read about it on this site and many other places.

This is just a slight variation where instead of getting you to send money to someone else they get you to send it back by threatening you. If you do it you will again find the original deposit reversed, leaving you poorer by whatever you sent back.

Your correct action is to say and do nothing. Send no money. Have no contact with the person and ignore their messages (block them if you can). The police will not come for you. If there is a fraud prevention organization where you live talk to them.

Eventually the money will vanish from your account. Do not spend it or transfer it to another account, and make sure you keep enough money in the account so when it is reversed you don't go overdrawn.

Answered by DJClayworth on December 27, 2020

It's a lie. The money he sent IS NOT REAL

This is a standard scam we see every week on here.

  1. The scammer pretends to be someone's sugar daddy
  2. seems to send money to the sugar baby, via a reversible method.
  3. gets the sugar baby to send money to the daddy via a non-reversible method.
  4. Not surprisingly, the money from step 2 disappears.
  5. Baby CANNOT reverse the money transfer from step 3.

Suppose the "daddy" sends you $1000 and you send $800 back. The $1000 is reversed/bounces/disappears. You now have $0 but paid out $800. So you are -$800 in the hole.

If you overdrew your bank account, you now owe that money to the bank. If you cashed a check and took out cash, the check bounced and the cops issue an arrest warrant.

Note how the "daddy" tells you how to send the money

Usually in this scam, the scammer gives specific instructions for how to return the money. That is because the scammer is tricking you into using a non-reversible method.

The "daddy" will claim to desperately need the money.

Bullpuckey. Sugar daddies, by definition, have money to spare and can afford to let go of the money. So the "daddy" does NOT need the money.

It isn't even real money. It's going to reverse / bounce very soon.

The strategy is to Wait, Wait, Wait.

First, tune them out: block them and ignore them. Never speak to them again.

It will take from several days to as long as a year for the fake money to suddenly disappear out of your account. Fake checks are rigged to take over a month to bounce (but the bank will "front" you the money after only a few days; that doesn't mean it's your money).

Transfers take as long as it takes for the sender to realize they've been scammed or hacked. You need to know where this money comes from; they scammed or stole it from other people. If the government is involved (tax refund, some poor senior's Social Security payment, etc.) it could really take a year.

LEAVE THE MONEY THERE. Don't spend it, don't move it. Treat it like you're holding it for someone else. (which you are: the other victim!!!)

Eventually, either a) the money will automagically disappear; or b) you'll hear from a banker or police officer If it's the last one, you go to your branch manager at your local bank and let the manager protect you from fake cops and that kind of thing.

If it's still there after the Statute of Limitations expires after 3-7 years, then it's yours to keep. In the meantime, just stop using the bank account and open another one for your daily banking.

The FBI won't hurt you if you do the above.

You are simply the victim of a scam, and you stopped entirely once you realized it was a scam, and held the money until it reversed/bounced. That is exactly what the police want to hear, and they'll be fine with that. That makes their job easy.

You don't need to report it to authorities.

However, if you were to send the money onward to the scammer, then you would be guilty of money laundering. This is usually about turning stolen money (what was sent to you) and turn it into clean money.

If you spent the money, you'd be guilty of fraud so don't do that either.

Answered by Harper - Reinstate Monica on December 27, 2020

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